Pre-Order ‘Evil Seeds’ Now!

You can now listen to clips and pre-order Those Poor Bastards’ new album “Evil Seeds,” on four different colors of limited edition vinyl, cassette or CD!

For one hellish month in the dead of winter, Those Poor Bastards barricaded themselves in the basement of a 1930’s schoolhouse to see what horrors they could conjure when completely cut off from the corrupting influence of the modern world. The result is their tenth, and perhaps most cohesive album, “Evil Seeds.”

These songs feature classic themes of violent struggle and loss with bizarre overtones of supernatural menace and dread. Scream along with eleven all new pessimistic sermons for the end of times.
Pre-Order Evil Seeds Now >

We’re also offering up super limited edition (only 10!) hand-numbered and signed test pressings. Get ’em quick!
Snag a Test Pressing >

Thanks pals. The official release date for this monstrosity is November 15th. All pre-orders will ship on or before that terrible day.

Your heartless friends,
Lonesome Wyatt and The Minister

Posted in New Releases

‘Agonizing Love’ Out Now!

Today is the official release date for Lonesome Wyatt and the Holy Spooks’ new album, “Agonizing Love,” on limited edition vinyl and digital download.

Thanks to all the sad sacks who’ve pre-ordered the the hurtful thing. We’re all sold out of neon pink, but still have some orange/white and blue splatter records left. You can get the download or vinyl right here if you have the strength:
Buy Now >

Next up will be Those Poor Bastards 10th full length album. Beware!

Your pal,
Lonesome Wyatt

Posted in New Releases

Pre-Order ‘Agonizing Love’ Now!


You can now listen to clips and pre-order Lonesome Wyatt and the Holy Spooks new album “Agonizing Love,” on three different heartbreaking colors of limited edition vinyl. Originally recorded in 2012, then regretfully buried for seven long years, this sad haunt of heartbreak’s past has finally been resurrected. Hear the agony and suffer alone forever.
Pre-Order Agonizing Love Now >

For the truly grief stricken, we’re offing up 5 hand numbered and signed test pressings. Get ‘em quick!
Snag a Test Pressing >

We also have some sad and terrifying new shirt designs!
Shop Shirts >

Thanks pals. The official release date for this pitiful thing is June 4. All pre-orders will ship on or before that lonely day.
Your miserable pal,
Lonesome Wyatt

Posted in New Releases

Kerrang! Features Those Poor Bastards

I guess we see the bitter humor in the absolute hopelessness and terror of life, and some bands seem to miss that cruel joke

Posted in TPB Press

Inhuman Nature Now Available!

Howdy Miserable Ones,

Today is the official release date for Those Poor Bastards new album “Inhuman Nature.” Come on over and get a cruel copy on limited edition vinyl, cassette, CD or digital download!
Order Inhuman Nature Now >

Thanks to everyone who pre-ordered! We sure do appreciate it and hope this record brings you many days of hopeless pain. They’ve all been shipped and should appear in your blood stained claws very soon.

Let the suffering begin!
your pals,
Those Poor Bastards

Posted in New Releases

Pre-Order ‘Inhuman Nature’ Now!


You can now listen to clips and pre-order our cruel new album “Inhuman Nature” on three different colors of limited edition vinyl, picture disc, cassette or CD!
Pre-Order Inhuman Nature Now >


We’re also offering up super limited edition (only 5!) hand-numbered and signed test pressings. Get ’em quick!
Snag a Test Pressing >


Wrap your ugly carcass in these holy garments of doom.
Shop Shirts >

Thanks pals. The official release date for this monstrosity is November 16th. All pre-orders will ship on or before that terrible day.
Your rotten friends,
Lonesome Wyatt and The Minister

Posted in New Releases

New TPB Album Preorder Starts Oct. 26!

Those Poor Bastards crawl from the muck to deliver their ninth full-length album of lo-fi country doom!

“Inhuman Nature” finds Lonesome Wyatt and The Minister performing an unflinching autopsy into the fathomless evil of the monster called man. Hints of early rock ’n’ roll and punk seep into the murky cracks of their sound to create a sinister hybrid of uneasy listening.

Pre-order for “Inhuman Nature” starts on October 26, 2018 at 12:01am EST! It will be available on limited edition vinyl, cassette, and CD. Vinyl options will include: 5 signed & numbered test pressings, 100 numbered picture discs, 200 black/yellow half & half, 200 magenta and black A-Side/B-Side and 300 clear and black smoke.

Let the suffering begin!

Your miserable pals,
Those Poor Bastards

Posted in Merch, New Releases

Behold the Abyss Vinyl and Edgar Books Now Available!

Today is the official release date for the limited edition vinyl repressing of “Behold The Abyss,” the all new novel of pulp western terror, “The Revolting Revelation of Edgar Switchblade” AND the reprinting of “The Terrible Tale of Edgar Switchblade!”

Get ‘em all right here grim pards:
Order Vinyl and Books >

Thanks a damn heap!

Your putrid pals,
Those Poor Bastards

Posted in Merch, New Releases

Pre-Order Vinyl and Books Today!

You can now pre-order the long-awaited repressing of the Those Poor Bastards’ 2012 album “Behold the Abyss” on limited edition yellow/red vinyl (500 copies) Get the horrid thing right here pals:
Pre-Order Vinyl >

Edgar Switchblade returns for an all new adventure of western terror in “The Revolting Revelation of Edgar Switchblade.” Get it here!
Pre-Order Book #3 >

We’ve also reprinted “The Terrible Tale of Edgar Switchblade,” so you can now own the whole ungodly pulp paperback trilogy. Get ‘em all!
Pre-Order Book #1 >

Thanks pals!

Your miserable pards,
Those Poor Bastards

Posted in Merch, New Releases

Satan is Watching 10th Anniversary Vinyl

To mourn the 10th anniversary of the original release of “Satan is Watching,” we’ve pressed the stinkin’ thing on limited edition red/black vinyl (500 copies). This version also includes a digital download and lyric sheet insert so you can scream along with the terror.

Get your fancy copy here >

Thanks pals!

Your miserable pards,
Those Poor Bastards

Posted in Merch, New Releases